Mind Dump

It’s late here
But sleep evades
Like it had for days
Change of surroundings
Coupled with stress
It always happens.

I’m missing you again
Heart yearning for what it doesn’t have
A dull constant ache of desire.
I’m sat watching the rain patter against the glass
As darkness falls, the cold welsh night.

I may go for a walk
Go watch the sea
As it laps at the bay
Again and again
The gentle rhythm soothing my tired mind
Like cool hands on fevered skin.

Skin…hands…once more my heart reminds me
Of this love I have for you.
I want to lay in your arms
Let this frenetic world pass me by
Two lovers entwined,
At one with each other.

I’m craving the sensuality
Your warm embrace provided.
I want to feel that femininity
I’d not felt till I felt your caress.
Craving the power that surged
Beneath my skin,
Carnal energy that made me shiver.

I’m rambling again,
My mind flowing faster than I can write
Wondering if I could even class this as poetry
It’s merely a mind dump of all the random stuff
That swamps my brain at the moment.
I find myself consoling my heart
That easter will arrive like a thief in the night,
Just like Christmas did,
And I can return to you again.

The rain has stopped
I think I’ll take that walk
I’ll let the cool sea air
Play across my face
And shout my love for you to the stars
There’s no one to hear me
But the wind and the waves and the Gods.
But with nature as my witness
I’ll declare my love, my lust
And dance across the sand
Laughing as the tempest roars
And I revel in my humanity.

I went to the beach
And the heavens opened
I didn’t care.
The stars and the peace I sought
Were awaiting me there.
Snippets of bad poetry
Echoed my footfalls
As I wandered the darkness.

I wonder if I’ll post this
Or keep it private…
Will I email it to you
Or keep it as a diary
Casting it into the depths of my drawers
To lay with other things I’ve deemed not good enough to share.

My words bounce round my mind
Thoughts of me, of you, of Genevieve, of exams
Of anything and everything and nothing.

I walk as if in a dream
My head in the clouds
My feet on the ground
It’s raining still
Running in rivulets down my face
Numbing and envigorating
Strange contrasts I barely notice
As I ruminate and reminisce and dream.

There is a freedom to be found here
In the stillness of the night
One cannot feel in the hours of light
Peaceful contentment, yet at times
So freeing of the mind
That one can at once feel regret.

I walk on in my never-ending dream
My waking dream.
The one I can only reach at night
When the bustle of the day has passed me by…
And still I wonder at the value of sharing this?
Is there some?
Or am I simply blogging in semi-poetic form.

Bad poetry, incorrect meter
Rubbish stanzas…
But a longing to release this torrent of words
A rhythm in my mind
Driving them onwards
Paying little heed to rhyme.

Is this the voice of my innermost being?
Freed at last to speak the thoughts I try to suppress?

I’m playing your own words in my head
Watching the images like a film across the theatre of my mind
I’m sounding like a cliché again.
Perhaps when sleep befalls me,
I can lose myself in your words, in an image you’ve crafted?

Perhaps, maybe, who knows…
I’m rambling again.
Good night, adieu.

(c)2008 RandomGoth.deviantart.com